seulement

A child alone in the thunderstorm. Winds howling, lightning flashing. Cold.

But

Alone. Suffering. This big kid with an umbrella comes walking by, looks at this child...laughs and mocks at him. Delights in his suffering. Enjoys every moment of it. The words of the big kid, penetrates like a razor knife. The child cries. 

When will help ever come.

When will the suffering stop.

When will justice be done.

What is love.

You do not know how much you have hurt me. Your insensitivity with words, your actions. And yet I still forgive you. I try my best to love you because that is what my God would have done. But yet you keep coming. I thought it was over, but it was anything but a calm sea. You want me on that roller coaster ride. Just what do you want? I console myself in the comfort of my room. I calm myself down. What love is there. What is justice. 

Lord, I'm frustrated. I'm pissed. I'm hurting. And i want to see justice done. This is not fair. Everything is about the process. It's never easy. But it sounds all so easy. Why do you put this big kid in my life. Why do I have to go through this? Moulding. Why is it all about me. Where is the love? I see none. I feel none. 

Hold my hand...